remember, remember the 5th of november

I am low on time today and cold.

I bought my Tegan & Sara tickets - February is a long time off in the distance but I am already looking forward to the impending road trip; I am often fond of leaving town that time of the year and I have an exceptionally good excuse this time around to leave it and traverse across Texas with some exceptionally good people.

Someone managed to make me mad within the first 10 minutes of me being awake earlier this morning; outside of me being called into work back when I was employed at the mental institution after attempting to sleep off an 18 hour shift, this may be a new record. I blame social networking for the ease at which extremely casual acquaintances of mine can be judgmental asshats in passing.

I have a temper to rival the force of Krakatoa. It may (or may not be, depending on how long you've known me) surprising to know that my immediate base reaction to things that make me mad or upset me is to start breaking things. Of course, I have not done this since my very early twenties. Self-control has set in under a thin veneer of maturity I've managed to build up over time.

I don't get mad easily, actually. It takes a lot to make me mad, if we're being completely honest - I can think of very specific moments in the history of me where I have sat in calm silence while all that life was proceeded to deteriorate around me at an alarming speed. There are a few quick triggers though. Being unreasonably hateful to perfectly nice people is one way to do it. My father refusing to admit that he's wrong OR say that he's sorry and becoming an even larger and angrier jerk to compensate for it when he actually does realize he's wrong is another (I have a very good relationship with my dad, by the way - but after a lifetime of this one particular juvenile quirk of his, it starts to get old). The third and probably most personal is assuming things about me - I think I touched on this earlier as a fear of mine, but at the root of it, I think I just get really pissed off when people heap their own concept of reason or meaning on me and then try to paint reality with their own brand of logic to make their reasoning rationale. In short, self-righteous "I know what is right and you are completely wrong" people make me mad. Really really freakin' mad.

Guy Fawkes day is a wonderfully violent holiday. How appropriate for this morning.